One of the holy grails of rumored movies, going back before there was an Internet to track such things, has been the inevitable (?) Simpsons Movie. Why inevitable? In a time when many animated TV shows (Pokemon, South Park, Recess, etc.) make the transition to film after just a few years of success, The Simpsons is the towering grand-daddy of TV comedy (animated or otherwise). Its lifetimes doubles or triples other shows, and yet, it never made the quick scramble for big screen bucks. It will, that we now know is all but certain, but the very crucial detail there is that it won’t happen until the TV series comes to a point where Matt Groening and crew are ready to call it quits, and there’s no sign that’s happening soon. The Simpsons at 12 is just as funny, clever and original as it was at 4 (yes, there are occasional hiccups, but at its worst, The Simpsons is still one of the best TV shows).

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The story opens with the unrestrained celebration of a normally-secretive wizarding world which for many years had been terrorised by Lord Voldemort. The previous night, Voldemort had discovered the refuge of the hidden Potter family, and killed Lily and James Potter. However, when he turned his wand against their infant son, Harry, his killing curse rebounded upon him. His body destroyed, Voldemort became a powerless spirit, seeking refuge in the undisturbed places of the world; Harry, meanwhile, was left with a distinctive lightning bolt scar on his forehead, the only physical sign of Voldemort’s curse. Harry’s mysterious defeat of Voldemort results in him being dubbed “The Boy Who Lived” by the wizarding world.

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In the Arctic Circle during the 1800s, Captain Archibald Witwicky chips away at a massive sheet of ice, only to break it and fall into an abyss, landing on a robotic hand partially buried in the ice. He finds the eyes of Decepticon leader Megatron staring back at him, who burns a map showing the location of the life giving Allspark into Witwicky’s eyeglasses. These are handed down to his descendant, Sam, in the present day. Elsewhere, Decepticon Blackout attacks a United States Air Force base in Qatar in the present day, grabbing and absorbing information from a computer whilst he destroys the base and deploys Scorponok. Scorponok chases Captain Lennox and his Special Ops team in the desert and in a village, when Lennox makes a phone call to The Pentagon, who send a jet to fight off the Decepticon. Sam Witwicky buys his first car, which happens to be the Autobot Bumblebee. Bumblebee helps Sam to gain Mikaela as his girlfriend. The Autobots come looking for Archibald’s glasses, whilst hiding in Sam’s yard, and the nefarious Sector 7 comes to invade Sam’s house. The film eventually concludes with a battle that begins at the Hoover Dam and concludes in Los Angeles as Autobot leader Optimus Prime and Megatron face each other.

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The film tells the success story of an unlikely hero; a rat named Rémy (voiced by Patton Oswalt) who finds himself in a Parisian restaurant made famous by an eccentric French chef, Auguste Gusteau. Rémy is not only a foodie, (so quite an outsider among his kinfolk), but aims to become a fine chef. This far-reaching ambition, incredibly enough, he achieves. In an interview, John Lasseter described the movie: “It is about a rat that wants to be a fine chef in a top French restaurant in Paris. It is a wonderful story about following your passions when all the world is against you. A rat to a kitchen is death; a kitchen to a rat is death.

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In the past few years, aging police officer John McClane (Bruce Willis) has spent his time in and out of Alcoholics Anonymous and has managed to get divorced from his wife. He is no longer employed by the police department, but has found a position with the United States Department of Homeland Security chasing dangerous computer hackers. On his way to turn a young hacker named Matt Foster (Justin Long) into custody, he experiences a modern version of a terrorist attack first hand when he gets stuck in traffic. A group of hackers have struck at the vulnerable United States computer infrastructure and are systematically shutting it down, beginning with the traffic light system. As they move on to crash banking networks and the stock market, the indices plummet and America’s economy becomes crippled. As usual, McClane gets caught up in the middle of the excitement. It turns out that the recently captured Matt seems bright enough to understand exactly what the terrorists are doing and what steps they are taking to achieve their mission. The sophisticated criminals have a nearly foolproof plan to bring the country to a halt, but they didn’t count on an old-school cop and his computer-smart buddy to figure things out. Soon, the crime-fighting duo of McClane and Foster are pulling out all the stops and matching wits with the terrorists, hoping to figure out the motives behind their actions and to stop them before the entire nation collapses to its knees on the anniversary day of its independence.

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